Body Neutrality

When people talk about body image, the conversation is usually about either loving your body or not liking the way you look. We are constantly told that we should love every part of ourselves, but sometimes that can be really challenging! It just isn’t always realistic to look in the mirror and feel completely positive about our bodies. This is where body neutrality can be helpful. 

Body neutrality is less about loving your appearance and more about accepting and respecting your body for what it does for you. Since there isn’t an exact definition, we borrowed from the National Eating Disorder Association’s approach to defining it. They break down the word by identifying the body as our physical structure, and neutrality as not taking one side in a disagreement. With this, they define body neutrality as not supporting the negative thoughts or hatred we sometimes have toward our bodies.  

One way to think about body neutrality is to ask yourself, “What does my body do for me?” Our bodies allow us to do so many things every day without us even thinking about it. We can walk, talk, breathe, eat, sleep, work, learn, exercise, and spend time with the people we care about. Our bodies allow us to experience life. It can also be helpful to think about our bodies as instruments. Thus, our bodies help us to make things happen! For example, our hands allow us to write, type, cook, draw, create things, and hold objects. Personally, I don't know how I could pet my precious animals without my hands!  

Taking care of our bodies is another important part of body neutrality. Things like getting enough sleep, drinking water, eating food that gives us energy, resting when we are tired, and moving our bodies can help us feel better. Taking care of ourselves does not have to be about changing the way we look. It can simply be about giving our bodies what they need. 

It can be hard not to expect perfection from our bodies. We live in a society where there are so many ideas about what the “perfect” body is supposed to look like. We see certain body types on social media, in ads, movies, and TV, and sometimes we start comparing ourselves to them. The problem is that these images do not always show reality. Pictures can be edited, filtered, posed, or taken under perfect lighting. Even when we logically know this, it can still be easy to compare ourselves to what we see. 

Other people can affect how we feel about our bodies. I think most people have heard someone say something negative about their own appearance, whether it is about their weight, skin, hair, or another part of their body. When we hear these kinds of comments often, it can make body criticism seem normal. We may even start talking about ourselves the same way. Being aware of the people and conversations around us can help. If we are constantly around people who criticize their bodies, it can affect the way we think about our own. We do not necessarily have to avoid those people, but we can recognize that their negative comments are not facts about what everyone’s body should look like. The media we consume can have a similar effect. A lot of social media sends messages that we should look a certain way to be attractive, successful, or accepted. 

Body neutrality gives us another way to look at all of this. Instead of asking, “Do I look good? We can ask, “How am I treating my body?” or “What does my body need from me?” This may be one of the most important ideas behind body neutrality. We do not have to love every part of our bodies every day. We also do not have to criticize ourselves for not looking a certain way. We can simply recognize that our bodies deserve care and respect.  

Our bodies are going to change throughout our lives, and that is normal. They do not have to be perfect to be valuable. Learning to appreciate what our bodies do for us, instead of only focusing on how they look, can help us develop a healthier relationship with ourselves. Body neutrality is not about loving your body all the time. It is about learning to live in your body without constantly fighting it.  

Notes on body neutrality

Body: Our physical structure. 

Neutrality: A state of not supporting either side of a conflict or disagreement.  

In literal terms then, body neutrality is, “Not supporting the hatred of our physical structure/body.” 

Here are some questions that help us think about bodies more neutrally:

How does your body serve you? 

How is your body an instrument of change? 

What feels good to your body? 

What makes your body work/feel good/ function best?  

What does this body part help you do? Choose a body part to discuss. 

Is there anything good that comes from your body? 

Is there space to respect, value, or honor your body in any way?  

How do you treat your body? 

Are you critical or understanding of your body? 

Do you expect perfection from your body?  

Have you heard negative things others spoke about their bodies? 

Are you around others now who are vocally negative about their bodies? 

What kind of media do you follow, and what does it say or imply about bodies? Is it negative, positive, or neutral? 

What does it say about how you should look?